


Tension: Matt Makes a Mistake

by sanbika



Series: The Many Adventures of Matt and the Voltron Paladins [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Langst, Season 3 continuation, world building
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-19
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2019-05-06 01:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14631210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanbika/pseuds/sanbika
Summary: Lance had a bit of an ego but his gift of insight wasn’t something he overestimated. Despite Keith’s best attempts at comforting him, and his slightly off-kilter attempt at a joke (his  math was pretty decent, all things considered), Lance hadn’t been wrong. There was a lion problem and when they had run into Matt and the REAL Shiro, not this unfortunate clone, Black had responded to her true paladin.And things became really awkward.





	Tension: Matt Makes a Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> Tracks: [Interstellar - Coward](https://youtu.be/SoP44KNu0IQ), [Message from Home](https://youtu.be/hOVUw1nxlek), and [No Time For Caution by Hans Zimmer](https://youtu.be/d5d0vBtwBK0)
> 
> Notes: This is not the same universe as [Discovery: Matt Meets a Paladin ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14628404). It’s not a linear sequel. I just like writing Matt and Lance together in fic.

Lance had a bit of an ego but his gift of insight wasn’t something he overestimated. Despite Keith’s best attempts at comforting him, and his slightly off-kilter attempt at a joke (his math was pretty decent, all things considered), Lance hadn’t been wrong. There was a lion problem and when they had run into Matt and the REAL Shiro, not this unfortunate clone, Black had responded to her true paladin.

And things became really awkward.

Keith had been trapped inside fighting Lotor one-on-one and couldn’t get to Black. All the other lions had been engaged with Galra ships as they waited to warp with the castle. And with one loud roar Black had raced back to Shiro at the castle and he had saved Keith and the day in one swoop. Pretty fitting for a hero.

There had been some uneasy discussion. Some hints at needing to know this meant for the team. Keith and Shiro were supposedly fine with Keith remaining the leader. But not everyone was. Pidge trusted Shiro more, now that he was back, and said as much. Hunk didn’t want to step on toes but felt pretty much the same. Even Keith looked oddly guilty when it was brought up - as though he felt inferior to Shiro - and truth be told, Lanc would bet he still did, despite everything.

In the end, Keith hadn’t forgotten their math discussion and had volunteered to stay back with Coran, as he had before, and Lance, weak as he was, didn’t have enough pride to do the same. He knew that despite his best intentions, Keith stayed behind because it was the honorable thing to do and not because it was best for the team. If Lance were better, smarter, stronger he might have done the same, knowing that his skills were still needed and that he’d never be told different.

But Lance didn’t question his friend, didn’t bring it up even when he saw Pidge and and Shiro and Allura’s eyes shift towards him and then away, guilty. He knew the line that everyone was thinking but refused to articulate. They were waiting for him to step down. And that was something he couldn’t do.

They could still form Voltron.

But there was tension and unspoken words coursing through them.

They were unsteady and the battle had been too dangerous.

They won but Lance wondered what would happen in the next battle and the next.

How long would they last with that simmering uncertainty coiled in the back of everyone’s minds?

If he stepped down, he’d be admitting to the team, and to himself, that he wasn’t the right paladin for the job. Red was great with him, she thrived off of his energy and the thrill he got from flying wildly in freaking space, especially when he remembered that he was protecting his home in doing so. But it was never the same as with Keith - they had never reached the same heights or speeds, were never in sync. Lance hadn’t unlocked any unique or new powers. And he knew he never would.

Lance was a waystation on the journey and his time was up. There was a better team waiting to be formed. But he didn’t have the heart to say it and no one would would force him to. And he wasn’t humble enough to stick around to see it happen naturally.

So here he was, neatly towing his things in an Altean version of a suitcase. It hovered behind him, connected to his belt by an energy tether, rattling slightly when he took corners too fast. He wasn’t wearing his armor but had nicked one that looked similar to Allura’s original battle suit, pink and all. His armor and the red bayard were neatly stacked on his bed. He hadn’t left a note - he respected his team too much to patronize them.

They’d figure it out.

Lance couldn’t stop shivering even though he wasn’t cold. Facing his feelings about bringing the team down wasn’t easy and he was pretty sure he was a moment away from a full-on breakdown. He hustled quickly and quietly to the end of the living corridors and knocked on the last door.

A light silhouetted Matt as he scratched his head, trying to look as though he’d been sleeping and failing badly. His hazel eyes were too alert and the computer behind him was in the middle of running lines of code. He pursed his lips awkwardly, slightly annoyed and clearly confused. They hadn’t talked much since their rescue as he and Pidge had been so focused on locating their dad.

“Lance, everything ok? It’s pretty late…”

He offered a tight smile, “I know, I don’t mean to wake you but remember when I helped rescue you from the Galra attack on your freedom fighters?”

Matt arched an eyebrow. Yeah, that did sound kind of arrogant in hindsight but he plowed on.

“Well I helped! And I’m calling in a favor and it’s a no-questions-asked, I-was-never-here kind of deal. But please come with me, I’m sure it’ll take you just a few dobashes.”

The older man paused, frowning as he scanned the hallway for any sign of coercion. Satisfied that it was just one of the paladin’s whims, he nodded and slipped on some shoes, light glinting off his metal toes. For some reason Lance couldn’t look away, wondering if he’d ever lose a body part in this war. He pulled himself together and started walking toward the pod hangar, far from the lions.

Matt kept his pace easily, stride close to the same size as Lance’s, and peered thoughtfully out of his new glasses.

“Can I ask what you need from me? Because if this affects Voltron, I can’t really make any promises of eternal secrecy.”

Lance chuckled. The Holt siblings were so alike in their need to know every damn detail and their dramatic nerdiness.

“I promise it won’t affect Voltron. I just need you to soup up a pod for me. Add cloaking. And maybe disable location tracking if that won’t take too long.”

Matt paused as they reached the first usable pod and forcibly turned Lance to face him. But the teen couldn’t hold his gaze, couldn’t handle the pity in it. So he pulled up the tablet in his hands and scanned the ship with it, checking that all of it was in working order and ready to go for a long trip.

Matt didn’t take his hand away and spoke firmly, falling into that Garrison tone “Lance, why are you running away? Where are you planning on going?”

Lance felt a bubble of defiance in him and took a few quick steps forward, pretending to look at a buffed out dent. Despite the hot emotion, he couldn’t help the waver in his voice as he spoke over his shoulder.

“I’m not running! I’m just…. doing what needs to be done. This really is for the best. Things will be better this way. Think about it. I’m not wrong.”

Matt didn’t say anything but turned to pull up a diagnostic screen on his computer and began inputting some numbers.

Lance had to hold onto the side of the ship, feeling weak with vindication and hurt all at once. His heart was pounding in his chest and he felt the chills return.

The thought that his team wasn’t in on his secret exhilarated him. And shook him to his core. Maybe it was his imagination but he felt like Red was antsy in the back of his mind. And it hurt to think of the team.

Hunk would be snoring in his pajamas with the mice hidden away in the little beds he’d made for them in his room. Pidge was most likely wide awake at her desk, still searching for her dad. Shiro was usually speaking with Allura in the common room at this hour. And Keith was training or passed out after training, without even showering like the filthy heathen he was. Coran usually looked at the star maps for another hour or two, taking notes and trying to update their databases with available info.

If the launch prep went on too long, he’d have to think of a quick explanation to avoid his plans being exposed in case someone came down.

Turning to Matt, he could see the other sneaking a glance before jumping when they met each other’s eyes.

The bespectacled man chewed his lip a bit and spoke up, “The cloaking is on, I guess Katie has been experimenting with these ships because it’s already functional. Taking the tracking off isn’t really necessary,” and here he held up a finger to quiet Lance’s protest, “These pods need to be within a certain amount of distance from the castle ship to be located. They aren’t meant to be fighters but emergency pods. They’re durable and can fight but they’re disposable.”

And the word ‘disposable’ hit him right in the chest for whatever reason. Lance just nodded and focused on keeping his jitters to himself.

“I’d say if you fly past the second closest planet and then use your top speed, the chances of tracking the pod are reduced by about 90% percent. Being that far away, the ship won’t register your warp and going that fast and far will make it like finding a needle in a haystack. Possible but not easily and not quickly. The trail will be cold by the time anyone knows you’re gone.”

Lance ducked his head again and didn’t even bother trying to smile, laser focused on his tablet.

“Good. And can you confirm my specs, here? It looks operational and ready for a trip of at least ten quintants from my end.”

Matt walked over and reviewed the tablet before nodding slowly.

“Coran has tuned these up nicely. And Katie’s upgrades have been fully integrated and safety tested. You shouldn’t have any problems. But Lance, really, what’s going on here? Are you seriously abandoning your team? Is this some kind of secret mission no one knows about but you? Because if I’ve learned anything from this whole crazy misadventure, you should never leave your family or your team. It’s a recipe for failure. You know what Shiro says-”

This time, Lance cut him off.

“We’re always stronger together. I know. But the thing is… he didn’t really specify who the ‘we’ is in that statement.”

Matt furrowed his brows clearly trying to get through and failing.

“Listen, I appreciate the concern but honestly, think about what’s going on right now. I know Pidge has told you. And I’m not saying anymore. I would never abandon the team. Don’t put that on me. But I am giving them an opportunity they’re refusing to take.”

He turned to meet the hazel gaze head on until it dropped to the computer screen. Matt was a space explorer, a genius, a survivor of the Galra empire, and a freedom fighter. He knew better than anyone what Lance was talking about.

And he knew that Lance was right.

They went about preparing the ship for flight, checking operation levels, safety features, and the like. Lance focused on the ship’s biosupport, rations, and first aid, silently wondering how soon he’d need to rely on it. He dropped his bag on the ground, stolen blaster clattering, hoping no one would notice the small things he’d taken from them all. Pidge would want her headphones back but he’d make it up to her someday.

When they were done, Matt smiled sadly. He looked conflicted but pressed a small device into his hands.

“It’s NOT a tracker, but if you want to talk to us, that’ll send out a signal that we can pick up. It’s a two-way radio that no one knows about but me, so don’t lose it.”

Lance felt his lower lip tremble and bit it so he wouldn’t totally fall apart in front of his friend.

“Thanks man. Consider us even.”

He went in for a fist bump but was pulled into a hug. He’d forgotten how strong Matt was.

“I don’t know what will make things okay for you, Lance, but I really don’t think you’ll find it out there by yourself. Yeah, it’s harder to stay and deal with this but better in the long run. Maybe you’ll feel okay after flying around for a bit? Just come back and no one will know. I won’t say a word.”

Lance made a soft assent but that cold pit in his stomach didn’t fade with the comfort. He wouldn’t come back. He wouldn’t stay here and let himself hold the team back.

He couldn’t stay here and watch himself slowly fade into the background either.

Matt walked away to release the airlock for this pod’s containment unit. He smiled and made a thumbs up. He believed his friend would come back. Lance waved and offered a thumbs up in return, feeling guilty.

He maneuvered the pod outside of the castle and put it on a speedy autopilot while he thought. He’d decided to head to the same sector as the Balmera, thinking that since Shay hadn’t contacted them it was still safe and he could make connections and longer plans there.

And it wouldn’t take too long to get there, three quintants at the pace he needed to disappear from the castle’s radar. He was just settling and trying to ward off the anxiety and uncertainty bubbling up only to have a minor freakout when a metal hand came gently down onto the arm of his pilot’s chair.

“Sh-shiro!” He gasped out to turn to see his hero only to be stunned into silence.

Not Shiro. Kuron.

“Wh-what are you doing here?” Lance managed to whisper. Of all the people to discover his hack attempt to be noble, the awkward clone of the black paladin was not one he had considered.

Sure he was friendly with Kuron and tried to talk but that guy was going through something, dealing with memories and an identity that wasn’t his own. They’d helped to free him from Galra control but he had been keeping to himself, not sure how to help and not wanting to hurt the team. Even if he wasn’t Shiro, he had the same considerate nature.

Kuron offered him a sober smile before slipping into the co-pilot’s chair and strapping himself in.

“Aren’t you going to stop me? Make me go back?”

The words slipped out before Lance stop himself.

Kuron looked out into space for a moment before glancing back at him.

“I know why you’re doing this. I don’t know if this is the best plan but then… I don’t know much of anything these days. I need to fight the Galra. But… I’m not sure how I can do it or if I’m needed here. I want to come with you, to help you.”

Lance had to swallow and blink hard to stop himself from crying, too brittle from the harshness of his thoughts. Kuron was trying to say he agreed with him. That Lance wasn’t needed here anymore.

Or he could be saying that he sees where you’re coming from, understands your position. What if he’s just coming because he’s worried you’re going to get yourself killed? Can you put him in danger-

He shook his head, like that could stop that little voice when nothing else could. He drummed his fingers and pulled up a screen of the castle ship behind them and pointed at it, staring right at the clone.

“Look, you have to know I’m not going back there. If I stay, I’m messing up the team. If I go back, then I can’t live with myself knowing that I was too much of a coward to do the right thing. I’m leaving and fighting the Galra any way I can. I don’t know what that’ll mean for me, but you should know this is most likely a one-way ticket.”

The older man, so similar to Shiro and somehow… not quite the same, looked disturbed for a moment. Like Lance had said something wrong but he didn’t want to correct him. He held Lance’s gaze, however, until he smiled softly.

“I’m okay with that. Where are we headed, Commander?”

Hearing that word, addressed to him from the clone of a man he’d looked up to for years was not easy. He didn’t know whether Kuron was saying that because he hadn’t truly earned the rank Shiro had or as a sign that he trusted Lance but he felt a surge of pride he’d been waiting a very long time for.

Lance pulled himself together and finished entering the coordinates. He grinned over at his Co-Pilot.

“We’re headed toward Shay and the Balmerans. They’ll give us some intel and we can start our own response plan to the SOS calls we receive on our way. I want to stay under the radar of Voltron and the Galra. My goals are to assist civilians quickly and effectively and get out as soon as possible. What do you think, Kuron?”

It occurred to Lance as he word-vomited a bunch of thoughts that been on his mind these past few days how grateful he was to have a friend here. If he’d been flying this alone, he’d probably be in the middle of a panic attack. And looking at Kuron’s surprised face, he realized that he hadn’t addressed Kuron or even asked him how he felt since… well, since Shiro had come back.

“That sounds like a great plan. I’m happy to act as your number two. I’ll monitor the ship and log any SOS or other communications for you. It sounds like you’ve got a pretty good handle on things.”

Lance felt a little ashamed that he hadn’t thought to talk to him at all. Even if he was a Galra experiment, he was still sentient, he still had thoughts and feelings.

“By the way, I’ve been meaning to ask what you’d like to be called… I mean, it’s a little weird to say Shiro and then your Galra name means Clone so…”

The other man smiled broadly, “Thanks, Lance, you know, Shiro and I talked about that for a bit. I like the name Kuro for a few different reasons, so just call me that.”

Lance pursed his lips, “Kuro, huh? Well, it’s just the two of us and our beautiful pod ship. I haven’t thought of a name yet, but we can pick one later. And I’m… really glad to have you on board with me.”

Kuro reached out with his metal hand and they shook.

Looking out the window, he noticed that they were halfway past the second orbiting planet in that system. Pretty soon the only way that Allura and the others would hear from them was if he chose to use the communication device.

A wave of fear overcame him for a second and he focused on the castle in the screen he’d pointed to earlier.

Things would be better this way.

Voltron would be stronger with him gone.

This war was bigger than him and his feelings.

He was ready to go.

“All right, Kuro. I’m putting us into our top speed. Ready when you are.”

Kuro nodded, regaining his serious demeanor. Lance put the pod’s thrusters into position and closed the screen of the castle.

And then they were gone.

**Author's Note:**

> Check out my [tumblr!](https://figandmelon.tumblr.com)


End file.
